Dear Survivor (a letter to read to heal)
[This is a letter I wrote to myself after one of many panic attacks. I struggle with clinical depression and these are words I sometimes have to remind myself. I would like to share this in the hopes that this can help someone out there.]
Congratulations! You have made it through the storm. You were hurt, abandoned, killed over and over and over. Yet you are still among us, living and breathing. Your eyes are tired and your body is bruised, your hands are shaking and your legs are onto their last strand of strength to keep you standing. You keep your head down and your stare to the ground, but you have made it to the safe island. You may not realize how brave you are nor do you know that all of those who love you are the luckiest of all, because you are still among them. You are a survivor of your mind and though your battle was invisible to the eye, it was far from a work of your imagination. You are not normal. You have it tougher than the rest of the population and you haven’t succumbed under the weight of your despair. You deserve a standing ovation but you won’t get one because nobody understands how tough it has been.
You are very young and your whole life is in front of you. You have time to find yourself again, fall in love with life again, make new encounters, gain new experiences in all fields, touch many people’s lives. You have time to explore this world of ours, in your own way. Don’t close your eyes to the wonders of our human condition. Be angry and frustrated, but not at yourself for little things you have or haven't done. Don’t kick yourself to the ground as though you were nothing because you are precious to this world. There is magic inside of you which you have to set free and use to make beauty and goodness. Touch people deeply, love deeply, feel deeply. You are okay. You are strong. This battle is all in your head. You against you. The harder it is, the stronger that means you are.
Often remind yourself that what you are going through is extremely hard, but it’s not impossible. You have to be very patient and let go of your idea of your best self. Forget about what others are doing and where they’re at and focus on your self. That is where the work is at. This is where you have to make a change before touching anybody else’s life. So tend your own garden. Plant seeds of inspiration, beauty, love and kindness. In no time these seeds will grow and they will bloom. Often remind yourself that you have travelled from very far down the rabbit’s hole to simply be fine. So don’t take each day for granted and keep on working really hard. This will all make sense someday as it is shaping your future. You may not understand it now but you will, in no time.
You are extraordinary and many people love you deeply. It may be hard to believe right now but you will do great things, not so long from now. You will stand in a crowd and people will see the light coming from you. You will have words to say and stories to tell. Your work will be valued and though you don’t believe me right now, you will be genuinely happy. This is meant to be so stand strong in front of adversity and let time and effort do their job to heal you.
Read this letter as often as you need to .
Learn to love every single bit of you because we all do.